A Brighter Dawn
by too-old-to-still-be-a-twihard
Summary: "Dartmouth term started in 18 days, and rather than fly across the country, Edward had the idea to make a road trip out of it. I can't say I was looking forward to a culturally enriching experience across the country I grew up in, but it had potential." Breaking Dawn AU. Canon compliant characters, story diverges from BD. Rated M for potential lemons, but mostly fluff.
1. Responsibilites?

**A/N This fic follows BD canon up until the day Edward goes hunting off of Isle Esme; Bella doesn't wake up unwell whilst hes' gone. We pick up the day after Edward's gone hunting. Please enjoy, maybe leave a review, I hope to update soon!**

* * *

I was high above the clouds, looking out a plane window. I could see mom waving. Phil held her hand, and between them sat a puppy. My body filled with warmth - this would be her compacted, simple family from now on, she'd be happy like this.

Before I knew it I was alighting the plane, alone; blinding light and a sticky heat assaulted me, where was I?

"Bella…." His voice, soft and warm, right by my ear. Where was he? I couldn't locate him in the brightness. "Wake up, love."

Real world scepticism flushed through my thoughts; Renee doesn't own a puppy - she's far too flighty for that kind of commitment. Also, how would I have seen mom and Phil from 30,000 ft up in a plane? The missing time frame between flying and landing made sense – it had all simply been the glitch of a logistically unfeasible (but totally believable at the time) dream.

"Ghnrrnn" was the intelligent complaint that left my mouth as I awoke. I only had to try opening my eyes once before I realised the blinding brightness in my dream existed in this reality too, and no I did not want to look at it.

"It's nearly noon, you've been asleep for 11 hours." The cool words murmured in my ear slipped down my neck, transforming into a delicate stream of kisses to my shoulder.

"So?" I sighed, revelling in my limbo of sleepy awakeness. I felt his body curl closer to mine, spooning me.

" _So_ we've been here over three weeks…" a cool hand slipped over my hip, up to my waist, "…and as much as I'd like to stay here, with you, forever…", he paused to place his lips against the back of my neck, while the wandering hand slid forth over my stomach, up my ribcage, "…we have responsibilities we must attend to." His hand stalled beneath my breast as he placed a quick kiss on my neck, and then withdrew all contact between us.

I rolled over, a frown on my face expressing how displeased I was with his departure from the bed. I managed to wrench open my eyes in time to watch him pull a t-shirt over his head. His boxers were already on. Damn.

"But you only went hunting yesterday!" I protested, stretching my legs and arms out to starfish across the bed, "surely that's your responsibility taken care of for another two weeks?"

I heard him rifling through the contents of his suitcase, but he didn't answer.

To be quite honest, it bothered me enough when I woke up without him yesterday as he went to the mainland to hunt. For the few hours I was left to my own devices I was completed unsettled, I ended up watching old movies and napping on the couch, and snacking on peanut butter straight out the jar with a spoon.

I stared at the ceiling, realising how truly relaxed my life had been whilst on Isle Esme. The thought of returning to civilisation, and responsibilities, was not at all appealing right now.

The rifling noise stopped, and suddenly a college prospectus blocked my view of the ceiling fan. A multi-ethnic group of teens sat with books across their laps on a green lawn, a large, Georgian-style building shaded them.

"It's time to think about college, Bella."

Ugh, real life, actual responsibilities? I was asleep two minutes ago, and now he wants to talk four-year commitments to an education I'm not entirely sure I want?

"Edward-" I began, before a finger placed on my lips silenced me. I met his eyes, frustrated at his interruption. He simply smiled.

"Bella," he mocked, before softening his voice, "you said you wanted to do this." There was almost a hidden question in his voice, doubting his words.

"I do," I smiled, and his eyes brightened again, "just not quite yet…". Sitting up, I captured his lips with my own.

He caught on to what I wanted immediately, and pulled away all too quickly, "we can still do that at college, you know," humour danced in his eyes.

"I'll never make it to any classes with you in my bed, and you know that!" I laughed, envisioning our life. Our married life.

 _Groggy, and displeased I slam the kill button on my alarm clock – 7am. I slump out of bed and pull on a dressing gown. My nose follows the scent of fresh-ground coffee. I never used to drink coffee, but I'm a student now, and it has become a lifeline._

 _Edward is in the kitchen, pouring out a shot of espresso into a mug of hot, frothy milk. "Mmmm, I love you," I mumble, sliding onto a stool at the kitchen table and taking the mug from his hands._

 _"Having any regrets yet?" he taunts. I briefly consider being irritated at him, before I realise I don't have the energy to rise to his teasing._

 _"All of the regrets," I affirm, taking a glorious first sip. My head harbours a dull ache, and I barely keep my eyes open. Last night I went to my first college party._

 _Edward came with, of course, and made sure I was safe, and didn't drink too much. I was surprised he didn't stop me from drinking at all – but when I was handed my first red cup from a girl I sat with in seminars, he simply smiled._

 _He encourages all my human experiences, but I wish this once that he hadn't. The memories come flooding back._

 _"Oh no." I gasp, "I danced." A shocked statement._

 _He grins back at me, the cat who ate the goddamned canary, "yes, yes you did."_

 _"It was bad, oh my, oh no, it was_ so _bad!" Flickers of colourful lights and smiling faces dance back into my memories. One memory stands out, Edward, across the room, watching me, expression unreadable. I bury my face in my hands._

 _"Define bad." He scoots onto the stool next to mine, and whispers in my ear, "you managed to seduce me into coming home with you…"_

 _"We're married," I groan, "you had to come home with me!"_

I was drawn out of my daydream by Edward, who, now stood by the bed, scooped me up into a fireman carry over his shoulder. "You will make it to your classes, even if I have to drag you out of bed like this every day" he said, as he walked us toward the bedroom door.

I laughed, "fine by me, but I don't think it's my physical ability to leave bed that'll be the problem… it'll be your libido that holds us back."

He stilled, turned around, and gently threw me back onto the mattress. His face was in front of mine as he crawled on top of me, " _my_ libido will be the problem?" he asked incredulously.

Beneath him, I lay breathless, still slightly stunned by the turnaround. His eyes turned dark as they moved from my face to observe my still naked body. My knees weakened.

He didn't have to touch me with his hands, I felt his eyes. And it broke me. I leant forward, throwing my arms around his neck to bring his mouth to mine.

I kissed him hard, moaning as I pressed against him. He pushed back against me, and unwrapped my arms from around his neck so he could hold them above my head. I felt hot and bothered by the time he pulled away – presumably to allow me time to breathe. But when I opened my eyes again, his dark, smouldering gaze had given way to playful golden eyes, " _my_ libido will be the problem?" he repeated.

I yanked my wrists out of his hold above my head, "that's what I said," I clarified, defiance in my gaze. Then my stomach made its presence known with a gentle rumble.

He smiled, and kissed me gently. "Come on, little human, we should probably get you fed."

He rolled out of bed to pass me a soft gown Alice had thoughtfully packed. I got out of bed and bypassed him to pick up the shirt he'd left on the floor last night.

"You know what I'm really craving?" I mused as we reached the kitchen.

"Haven't a clue, my love," he chuckled, as he cracked two eggs into a pan.

* * *

 **A/N: It's been, what? 5 years since my last story? I was barely in high school last time I wrote a story on , and now I'm in the final year of my bachelor's degree? Where has the time gone?! Hope you continue to read!**


	2. Dragging out the Honeymoon

**Welcome back to Chapter 2 of ABD! Thank you guys for reading, and shout-out to my two reviewers, you guys give me life! This fic is a baby of procrastination, so it drags and is disgustingly fluffy. Let me know what you think of it.**

"So," I slumped back into the chair, patting my full stomach, "what's on the agenda today?"

"What's _left_ of today," he amended, picking up the empty plate in front of me, "I was thinking we'd visit the cliffs on the far end of the island, the sunset is only seven hours away, and it really is quite spectacular."

I mulled over the idea, we'd seen it once before – one of Edward's more successful forms of distracting me. It was honestly beautiful, so much so I'd _almost_ forgotten what I wanted so badly from Edward.

"That sounds nice… on the condition I don't have to walk this time. I feel tired just thinking of the hike."

"Fine by me." He'd already finished the washing up and was leaning on the counter in front of me, "what would you like to do in the meantime?"

"Let me take a shower and then we'll decide.

It wasn't until I was in the shower that I noticed the state of my legs.

 _Holy…_ I mouthed, holding one leg out in front of me. I'd been _naked_ in front of him, with legs like a _man_. I leant out the shower to grab a razor from the shelf, lathered up my legs with soap, and began to hack at the forest that grown there.

A knock on the door brought me out of my weed-whacking episode, "Bella? Are you alright?"

Ah geez I'd been in here a while, "Yeah, I'm fine! Give me a few minutes!"

I hurriedly leant down to shave off the last patch of hair on my shin, when the horrible wave of hot dizziness clouded my brain.

A pathetic moan slipped from my lips as I felt my knees weaken beneath my weight, and collapse.

I threw my hands out against the glass door of the shower, dropping my razor in the process. It managed to slow my fall, but I inevitably ended up on the floor, pathetically curled up against one corner, letting the hot water run down my face.

"Bella?!" Edward had let himself in and opened the sliding panel of the shower. He reached above me to turn off the water, "Jesus Christ, are you okay? What happened?"

My head still felt hot as I tried to focus my pinhole vision on a singular tile next to me on the floor, "I'm… I'm okay…" I felt extremely confused.

My plane of vision slowly widened as the peripheral darkness faded, I didn't realise the floor tiles were red…

"Oh Bella," he murmured, gently picking me up out the shower and setting me on the bath mat instead, "you've cut yourself".

Huh? When did that happen? The confusion receded as I realised I'd bled, "let me take care of it," I mumbled, "you don't need to…"

I looked around for the source of blood, or even for a source of pain, but couldn't find anything.

"You fell on your razor," he didn't sound as if he was struggling with the smell of my blood.

"Oh" I checked my palms.

"It's just a small cut."

I stopped looking for cut and looked at him instead. He was creased up.

"On your bottom."

"Great." I harrumphed. The dizziness had completely cleared, so I got up and looked at my butt in the mirror. Three small grazes marked the spot I'd fallen onto my razor blade, the cuts barely wept. The running water must've made the blood look worse than it really was.

I caught Edward's amused gaze in the mirror.

"Would you like me to kiss it better?" He teased, before allowing himself to laugh, and the episode was pretty much forgotten.

We took it easy for the rest of the day. He managed to broach the topic of college again and I conceded to a research session.

I sat on his lap in the office as he surfed the web.

"That one looks interesting!" I pointed at the module option on the screen and he clicked the link.

I read through the content; a long paragraph about the teaching of the course, the educators, and the assessment methods, "This one! Definitely this one!" I decided, "no exams _and_ part of the grade involves an overseas field trip." I looked back at him to get his opinion on it.

"Go for it." He smiled a smile so broad I barely recognised him.

"What?" I smiled back questioningly.

"It makes me so happy to see you excited over this, you have no idea."

My heart hurt. He loved me so much.

"This will be my first time at college…" I admitted bashfully.

"And you'll be amazing." He leant forward, wrapping his arms around me so I leant against his chest. I relaxed into his embrace; everything really was going to be okay. And we were going to _college_.

"They've got some really nice halls there as well, I know we've got a house waiting, but a true college experience would involve living in dorms –"

"No. No way. Nope. Nopety-nope." I interrupted, "Not happening." I added for good measure.

"Okay." He nodded, and didn't bring it up again.

We left the house at 6, after I grazed on a light dinner of cured meats and fruit. I felt good; full of life, and enthusiastic about our future. "Why don't we walk the first bit down by the sea?" I offered, "I've barely done anything today, and a little exercise wouldn't hurt."

Edward and I wandered, hand in hand, barefoot down by the water. The lukewarm wash brushed over my toes occasionally, dragging sand back over my feet. Having to wrestle my feet out of their sand burial every two steps certainly lengthened the walk beyond what it should've taken. But we laughed, and it felt so good to laugh that we let it happen.

We'd walked maybe half a mile by the time it tripped me up. Edward caught me, of course. "Come on, sandman, we're going to miss the sunset at this rate."

I rolled my eyes before jumping onto his back, "onward, Secretariat!" He began running, and boy, did he run. The tropical flora blurred into a background of dizzyingly bright colours, and although his run was smooth, the hills and dips were unavoidable, and my stomach turned.

We arrived at the cliffs in less than two minutes, but it felt like a lifetime later by the time I stumbled off his back. I found the closest tree I could, and rested my forehead against it. My stomach churned out a nasty noise, and Edward finally turned around to look at me.

"Bella I'm so sorry! I wasn't thinking, I knew you were used to me running that speed, but you just had dinner and I didn't think I'm – "

I held a finger up at him as I wheeled around, my back to him, as I encountered my dinner for the second time today. His hands held my hair back and he continued apologising through the heaves.

"Urgh," I felt like the episode had passed, "it's okay, really, it wasn't you, the humidity here messes with me." I lied. Badly. He saw straight through it.

"Come 'ere," he threw an arm over my shoulder and we settled down near the edge of the cliff. He brought a monogrammed handkerchief out of his pocket and offered it to me. _E.A.M_ it read, in an elaborate font.

"How old is _this_?" my eyes widened at the stitching, more specifically at the lack of the Cullen initial.

"Older than you, my love."

I looked at down at the material in my hand, then back up at him, "I'm not using an antique to wipe my vomit mouth!" I protested.

"Oh, Bella, it's just a bit of cloth. I have so many of them don't worry about it." I doubted him briefly before deciding I'd rather wipe my face than preserve an artefact.

"You're not having a good day, are you?" he teased, passing me a bottle of water from the small satchel he'd thought to bring with us. I took a large gulp to wash my mouth, "is this really anything new?"

"No, I guess not." He frowned. "Look, the show's about to start." He pointed to the horizon in front of us.

Oranges and yellows and pinks streaked across the sky. More vivid than any watercolour could paint, more depth than an acrylic could muster. It took my breath away.

Vomit forgotten, I huddled into Edward's embrace and sighed.

It was over all too quickly, and soon we were sat in cool darkness. Edward draped a blanket over my shoulders as we watched dolphins dance in and out of the waves in the waning light. Like all good things, it had to come to an end.

"We ought to go back soon, shouldn't we?" I sighed.

"We can stay as long as you like." He assured.

"But we want to start at Dartmouth this year; that's only a couple of weeks away…" I felt slightly saddened, but a small flame of excitement was smouldering in the pit of my stomach. I turned to him, "besides, I do kind of miss our family."

He smiled down at me, "and I'm sure they miss us."

"Just a couple more days, then we'll go home."

"Home." He agreed. And we settled into silence, bereaving the end of our wonderful first honeymoon.


	3. Home Time

_How much of this can I leave here and pretend I forgot to pack?_ I wonder, lifting a stringy item out of our drawer – I'm pretty sure it's underwear, I recognise the label from the thongs that used to peek out of the top of Lauren Mallory's jeans when she sat in the front row in classes, but this pair seems to be missing a crotch? I do appreciate Alice's efforts, as uncomfortably invasive as the idea of her shopping for these things was, I know her heart was in the right place and that she only wanted for Edward and I to enjoy our honeymoon as much as possible. I do ponder though, in what scenario she'd foreseen that I'd wear _these_.

"Have you finished packing yet, love?" I heard Edward call from the kitchen.

"Err… sorta?" I called back, "I _may_ intentionally leave a few items though…"

He walked in and sat on the bed, amusement pulling at his lips as he took the silky material I was studying from my hands, "and leave it for Carlisle and Esme to find next time they visit their island you mean?"

"Fair point," I held my hand out, ready to stuff the piece under less offensive items in my suitcase, "we'll just take it home and burn it there."

He grinned his beautiful, cheeky grin and momentarily I was dazzled again, "Or maybe, just maybe, you might come around to wearing them…" My cheeks bloomed crimson, and my entire face got hot – not from lust but sheer embarrassment

He laughed as he stalked out the room, chucking the underwear on top of my bag, "are you ready for something to eat?" he asked, "I made paella."

It's endlessly frustrating that my husband has had nigh on 90 years of vampire dexterity and concentration master music, the arts, and sciences – but it _really_ takes the biscuit, that in less than 2 years, he's also mastered cooking. He can't even taste the finished product, but whatever he makes it's always cooked from raw ingredients, and there's never too much or too little seasoning.

So, when I'm sat at the table, with Edward leaning forward, elbows on the surface, seeking approval as I take my first spoonful, I make sure I shoot him a glare.

"It's good, yes?" He beamed, and I nodded in defeat.

"Yes," I groan, "it's really good." I worked through two portions before succumbing to sleepiness. Edward swept my plate out from in front of me and washed it up whilst I attempted to blink the tiredness out of my eyes.

"Would you like a quick nap before we leave?" he whispered in my ear, suddenly behind me, "It's going to be a long journey home."

He's right of course, between the boat ride, airport transfers, and flights, the journey will take over 20 hours. I swivelled on my stool to look him in his concerned butterscotch eyes, "I'll have plenty of time to sleep on the plane, when do we have to leave the island?"

I spent my last hour on the island traipsing through the house. Acutely aware that the next people to frequent this island would likely be my parents-in-law, I checked under every bed and christened surface for discarded clothing. Edward found it hilarious, and assured me that he'd already picked up everything, but since both of us were usually pretty unobservant when it got down to the act of it, I'm not sure I trusted him.

We left Isle Esme as the sun began to set. Edward had booked the flights for late evening so that our journey through the city to Rio-Galeão International would be covered by twilight. I was sad to watch the island disappear from the horizon, not only did we consummate our marriage there, but we also grew as a couple.

Never in my life had I seen Edward so carefree and happy, for the first time there wasn't a knife hanging above our heads, and I imagine the quietness he got from not being surrounded from so many other people and their thoughts definitely helped.

I would never admit it to his face, but sex had also done wonders for the boy. Beneath his cold, hard exterior and old-fashioned propriety, he had a cheeky sense of humour, and boyish carelessness that was beyond refreshing to see from him.

It was only once we'd reached the airport that I realised that I'd lacked to buy any souvenirs for anyone back home. I wasn't usually a materialistic person, a lot of that was thanks to Charlie who hated knick-knacks (or "dust-collectors" as he usually referred to them), but in the singular hour-long phone call I'd had with Renee on the island, I'd sung the praises of beautiful Rio de Janeiro to try and dispel the fact Edward and I had barely left the bed.

To try and hold up the illusion we went out and did tourist things, I picked out a brightly coloured, handmade bookmark for my mom, and Christ the Redeemer bottle openers for my dad and Phil. "Do you think Alice would like a t-shirt?" I'd joked to Edward, gesturing to the bright yellow stack of "I HEART RIO" tourist shirts.

I actually ended up buying one myself, partially to irritate Alice (she'd packed a suitcase full of expensive designer items and yet here I choose to wear a R$15 canary yellow, synthetic fibre shirt from duty-free), but mostly because, secretly, this was the first proper out-of-country holiday I'd been on, and my small-town heart beamed with pride from it.

The flight back to the US took a very long ten hours. Somewhere over the Caribbean Sea we hit some mean turbulence which my stomach didn't take too well to. The stewardess offered me a Brazilian soda, supposedly the bubbles would help settle my stomach. Neither I, nor Edward, was prepared for the caffeine kick I got from drinking it. Once the sickness had passed I didn't stop talking his ear off for a solid hour.

Thankfully, the connecting flight from Houston to Seattle had a very short layover, because shortly after my caffeine high peaked, I crashed, and managed to stay comatose for the 4-hour flight to SeaTac airport.

"Rise and shine, sleeping beauty." His soft voice murmured next to my ear. I moaned and nuzzled into his neck, wanting to prolong my sleep. "I could carry you off the plane, but it might look a bit odd to bystanders."

"I'm odd anyway, we knew this, who cares what they think?" I mumbled. Edward chuckled.

"Alright then." He yielded, a laugh hidden in his angelic tone. I felt his hands sliding underneath my back and legs to cradle me, and abruptly woke up.

"Whoa! No you don't!" I slithered out of his arms and stood upright on my own. I straightened out my creased t-shirt and tried to smooth my hair to something resembling presentable; judging by the rumpled state I was in, I'd had a darn good nap.

Edward carried our bags off the plane, and for the sake of onlooking humans, loaded our suitcases onto a trolley to wheel through nothing-to-declare. It took no time at all to spot Emmett, who wielded a very large placard reading "CONGRATULATIONS ON LOSING YOUR VIRGINITY, EDWARD!"

The fury in Edward's eyes was unlike any I'd seen before, but he softened once he glanced me out the corner of his eye, laughing like a lunatic. As fast as was humanlike, Edward had zipped over to barrier behind which his brother waited and ripped the sign out of his hand. I don't know what he did with it, but by the time I'd walked over I couldn't see it anywhere.

"Bella!" I heard my name cried, as all 4 feet and 10 inches of my tiny sister-in-law vaulted the barrier and engulfed me in a hug. I hadn't realised how much I'd missed my new family, and I hugged her back with as much strength as I could muster.

"I forgive you for the t-shirt," she whispered in my ear before pulling away, picking at the material I wore, and smiling sweetly at me, "but don't expect to keep it."

"My turn!" Emmett's voice pierced through the moment, and I find myself extricated from Alice's hold, and lifted over the barrier for a solid bear hug.

"Be careful with my wife, please, it took a lot of effort to find her _and_ not eat her." I heard Edward joke as he joined us.

Emmett put me down and whistled loudly, "wow, Bella, seems like you managed to pull that spoon out his ass whilst you were at it! I haven't heard him joke like that ever! Good job!"

"Don't be an ass, Emmett." Edward retorted.

Emmett nudged me gently with his elbow and whispered conspiratorially in my ear, "maybe there's more spoon left up there." I smiled up at my big brother, so much life and love in him, I'd missed his innuendos and happy-go-lucky attitude as well.

Under normal conditions, the drive from Seattle to Forks would've been a little under 4 hours, with the Cullens, it was under 3 – although with Emmett and Alice in the front seat, and their indefatigable ribbing of me and Edward, it felt more like 5. I have never blushed so vigorously for such an extended period of time before. It was all in good jest, but by only one hour in I could tell Edward was ready to open the door and run home, and I wouldn't have been opposed to jumping out with him.

We were received by the rest of the family on the porch of the Cullen home. I ran into Esme's open arms as Edward rounded the car to help Jasper with luggage.

"I'm sorry about the sign, Edward," I heard Jasper say, "I'd already taken one off him that he'd made yesterday, I didn't realise he had another."

"Oh, Bella darling!" Esme exclaimed, stepping back to view me at arms distance, "you look positively glowing! The sun looks beautiful on you!"

"Thank you, Esme." I blushed, it was true, I had picked up something of a tan on the island, but knowing Forks, it would take mere weeks for the colour to leach from my skin again. "And, of course, I almost forgot, thank you so much for letting us use your island! It was beautiful."

Esme smiled that warm, motherly smile, "of course, anything for my children". It was the first time I think I'd been referred to as one of Esme's own, and my heart swelled. I noticed Carlisle step forward to join us, we embraced in a shorter, less intimate hug.

"And thank you to you, as well, Carlisle."

He smiled, "all Esme's idea. I take it the honeymoon went well?"

I doubt the blush would ever leave my cheeks, "wonderfully." I admitted.

It was evening in Forks, and the sun was all but gone from the sky – not that you'd be able to tell thanks to the overcast weather – but a slight chill started to permeate the perfection of the reunion. Esme ushered me inside, where I was greeted by the delicious scents of lemongrass and cumin, and I knew immediately that, despite being the only person in this family to actually eat, I would never be as good at cooking as the family I married into.

 **A/N: I've submitted my dissertation y'all! I have only 3 pieces of coursework and exam standing between me and thousands of hours of freedom to write (and read) fanfiction! Once again, shoutout to my scarce reviewers, I appreciate you all!**


	4. A whole lotta doing nothing

"So….." she prompted, as if the two letter word was the key to my locked lips.

"So, we had a lovely time." I surmised, unzipping the second suitcase that rested upon the bed next to my inquisitive new sister-in-law.

"And…?" her voice got higher.

"And we got a real giggle out of this stuff!" I flung the crotchless underwear I'd wanted to 'lose' at her, but missed entirely and they landed in a sorry flop upon the floor.

"They weren't intended for comedic purposes you know?" she said dryly. I knew alright, I knew exactly what they were meant for, and I tried not to meet her eyes as the tell-tale blush spread across my face.

"Oh! Come here!" she sighed, wrapping delicate fingers around my wrist and pulling me onto the bed next to her. She turned to face me cross-legged and leaned forward to pull my legs onto the bed into the same position so that we were face-to-face and I couldn't avoid her. "Bella we may all be geriatric by human standards, but we're still basically teenagers, and our hormones – or endocrinal venom, whatever - have kept with the times! You don't have to blush about this stuff with me! In fact, especially not me! I'm your best girlfriend, and you've finally jumped from the virgin wagon, I'm excited for you and we have _got_ to talk about it!"

I tried to suppress the smile and fixed my eyes on the patterns of the comforter we were sitting on. Alice was right, she was – and probably would forever be – my best girlfriend, and she had this _way_ of making me _want_ to talk and gush about things, but never felt the need to myself.

"So let's try again, girl," she lifted my chin and locked my eyes with hers, "how was the honeymoon?"

I let the grin break out, "if you foresee any of them coming home early whilst I'm mid honeymoon description you'll shut me up immediately, agreed?"

"Agreed." A devilish grin flooded her face.

By the time Edward and the rest of his family had returned home from the hunt, all of my clothes had been packed away into the wardrobe and all the sordid details of our honeymoon had been revealed.

It was early evening, almost a full 24 hours since we'd arrived back at the Cullen mansion from our honeymoon. Having eaten two full portions of the curry Esme had cooked up when we had gotten home, Edward just about managed to carry me to bed and tuck me under the duvet before I was dead to the world. His snoring jibes had resumed in the morning when I'd managed to wake myself up with a particularly loud intake (snort) of breath whilst I drifted in and out of sleep, "tease me all you want," I'd acquiesced, "but you will never know the bliss of snoring your way through 11 hours of sleep on 800 thread count sheets."

He'd rolled his eyes and whispered in my ear, "I know a better kind of bliss though…" and in my hazy sleepiness I'd been ready to jump him, but he and the family had wanted to take a hunting trip for the day, so my urges had to wait.

I'd looked forward to spending a day relaxing – maybe a hot bath with some of that gorgeous lavender oil to soothe my aching muscles from the extensive travelling, I could shave my legs and double shampoo and condition my hair, I'd drink green tea whilst browsing my college class electives on Edward's laptop… oh I'd wished. Alice had wanted to stay home. With me.

Ultimately, I managed to fit in a shower, unpacking my suitcase, and sending an email to mom to let her know I was home. Oh yeah, and I had _that talk_ with Alice. Thankfully she'd made herself absent when I'd sat down to watch a rerun of Malcolm in the Middle over a bowl of soup – just a mere 5 minutes before Edward and his mind reading capabilities sat down next to me on the sofa.

"Missed you." His lips murmured into my hair.

I stopped blowing on the spoon I held to my lips, and instead turned to smile at him – my stomach turned cartwheels, and my heart sped up its beat, whilst my mind slowed down and felt at peace. I hadn't realised how much I'd missed him – how bereft I'd felt in the wake of his absence – but now I felt like I was truly _home_.

Placing my bowl of soup on the coffee table, I moved in closer to him, to his scent, to his lips… "I –"

"Not on the couch, you guys… geez!"

"Emmett's home." We simultaneously murmured, lips inches apart, foreheads against each other.

"Damn straight I am! And damn lucky I am too! Y'all need a chaperone."

Edward sighed deeply and turned around to face him, "we're married, Emmett, we can do _it_ now, so we no longer require a chaperone, but thanks."

Emmett then launched himself over the back of the furniture before landing delicately next to my husband. He picked Edward's cool hands out of mine and got up to wedge himself between the two of us "I don't care what you newlyweds do in your own time, how you do it or when you do it, but Esme sure as hell will care about _where_ you do it – especially on her furniture."

"I was just going to kiss him! This is ludicrous!" I protested.

"I know what 'just kissing' leads to, Bella, I wasn't born yesterday." He turned to look me right in the eye, "And believe me, you do NOT want to be caught by Esme, doing that, on her antique furniture."

I caught Edward's smirk in the periphery of my vision and it clicked, "I feel like there's a story behind this defensiveness, Emmett," I grinned, "care to share?".

"We're home!" Esme's voice called throughout the house, and I heard the front door shut. I couldn't have hand-picked a kinder, more lovable mother-in-law than Esme. I knew that both Edward and Emmett would've heard the family approaching the house at 200 metres away, so Esme announcing their arrival was purely for my benefit.

"I will find out." I promised to Emmett quickly, and he fled the scene leaving us on the couch.

She ambled into the living room at human speed and immediately found me, "have you eaten yet?"

I gestured to the bowl in front of me, "I defrosted some soup from the freezer… I hope you don't mind?" It only now occurred to me I hadn't asked what was free game in the kitchen.

She tsked and batted her hand at me, "of course not, that smells like one of my earlier experiments in making tomato soup for you, and besides, no one here is going to fight you for it."

"There was a lot of food to decide from in there – if this soup is anything to go by, I can't wait to start working my way through it!" I smiled. Esme beamed back at me, the warm in her smile softening her eyes.

"Don't get too excited," Edward's voice pulled me away, "we've only a week before we need to set off again."

"A _week_?!" I hadn't realised. My head span, and I looked down at my hands in my lap.

"How exciting!" Esme chimed in, "this will be your first time through college… oh you're going to love it, Bella!"

A week. That's it. I had really not been paying attention – I'd been elsewhere, floundering about in my newlywed bliss with no responsibilities or deadlines, but now the clock was ticking. It wasn't the going to college bit that bothered me so much, it was the stopwatch timing my human life that was making me sick.

On the one hand, I was perfectly happy (if not delighted) to be staying human longer, so that I could enjoy all those little human moments I'd previously been missing out on, and no one was pressuring me to give it up. On the other hand, this indecision about when I wanted to be changed stretched out in front of me for miles into the unforeseeable future, and that giant, silent pendulum swung overhead, each whoosh of the heavy weight marking another second of mortality, of aging, of indecision.

For the first time I wished Edward was something different than he was. I wished he and his family were human, I wish they abided by the same timeline my family and friends did, so that I wouldn't have to choose.

My family. My mom, my dad… Charlie. Oh, dad. Every minute I strung out this process was going to make this harder. Knowing I was leaving him to an empty house when I agreed to move in with Edward post-wedding hurt my heart enough – but the selfishness of taking myself entirely away from him, leaving him to that house to himself, was like a punch in the stomach.

"Yeah…" I managed to murmur in response to Esme. But by the time I looked up from my lap, Edward and I were the only ones left in the room. He looked concerned, his thick brows knitted together and lips moulded into in a frown.

"Bella…" he started, scooching closer and holding my hands in his, "don't look so sad, it breaks my heart to see you like this… it's just college, no pressure for anything else."

I bit my lip to divert my attention from the tell-tale sting forming in my eyes, "it's not just college though, it's me moving on, going away from this place… it's the beginning of me distancing myself away from these people..."

I felt the floodgates weakening.

"…so that I can disappear."

And the dams broke.

A/N: Yeah so it's been a while since an update my bad I am a terrible person. A whole lotta nothing happens in this chapter so many sozzles for that but life has swept me up! Good news though: I will be graduating uni in 2 weeks with first class honours in biochemistry! Andddddd! I got a job as an assistant manager at a major soft beverage company that is not pepsi but the other one ;) anyway, I'm travelling emloads /emfor it, so I spend a lot of time in the car developing plot bunnies I intend to eventually write - I am very sorry for the delay, will try and get a better, more interesting chapter out soon! Reviews help:)!/strong/p


	5. The Journey Begins

"That the last one?"

My eyes were locked on the black suitcase at the bottom on the pile. It was half filled with my meagre wardrobe, toiletries, and souvenirs of my rainy hometown of Forks. I hoped the photoframe with a picture of my and Charlie at graduation wasn't getting crushed by the mass of "college Bella" clothes Alice had stuffed in the empty half before I had time to zip the thing shut. I had already said goodbye to Charlie, and whilst we intended to come back for visits, I knew I wouldn't see him in a long time.

Why did I need "college" specific clothes anyway? It wasn't a uniformed setting, and I wasn't trying to be someone else, a cool college kid. I wasn't going to argue with Alice either way. I had smiled and thanked her. Whilst a majority of her purchases were made for her enjoyment, I knew that in a hidden part of her heart she did it for me (I wasn't going to replace those ratty sweat pants, they were comfy as hell, but the jersey cotton alternative she found me were a godsend and I couldn't fault her on that.)

"Bella?"

"Huh?" I blinked out of my headspace. He wandered into my eyeline, smirking slightly.

"The last bag? Alice doesn't have any more for you?"

"Oh," I half chuckled, "I'm sure she does, but we better get out of here before she tries to tie them to the roof of your poor Volvo."

Edward smiled, and jokingly bent down to observe how low the car sat to the floor, "You're right, I don't think the old boy can take anymore weight."

"Your car is less than 4 years old! If he's old what does that make me? What does that make you?!"

He grinned. I was sat on the workbench at the back of the garage and he wandered toward me, fitting himself nicely in the gap between my legs whilst his hands found my hips.

"Practically prehistoric." He sighed, rolling his eyes before ducking in for a kiss. It was just a quick peck, but I was easily persuaded these days and I quickly lost myself.

I pushed back into the kiss, wanting more, only vaguely registering we were still in the garage.

"Alright my little fledglings!"

Oh that familiar voice. Edward pulled away from me, "hi, Emmett."

He was sauntering down the steps, followed by the rest of the family. In his arms was a covered hamper.

"I'll try not to get teary eyed, but I am very proud of you both, especially you Bells." Emmett sniffled dramatically. "I got you a going away/coming of age/college gift. "

"Oooh, what is it?" I questioned, lifting the cover.

"Nu-uh!" He whipped it away from me and put it in the backseat of the car, "it's for when you get to Dartmouth."

"That's not for another two weeks." I reminded him, "If there's a puppy in there, tell me now."

"Nah, sorry Bells," He nudged and winked at me, "Jasper got the munchies on the way back from the store. I can guarantee everything in here is non-perishable!"

"Sorry Bella, he wasn't housetrained, it was for the best" Jasper quipped from behind the bulky man.

"Okay then, thank you." I smiled graciously.

"Time to go?" Edward asked, lifting one perfect brow in questioning.

I tried to stifle the sadness on my face, "Yeah, we need to get on the road." The quiet sadness that burbled in my stomach climbed into my chest and clutched my throat tight.

I ran in to Emmett's arms. He'd become, in the best way, part of the furniture in my life. The big brother who is unquestionably always there. With his jokes and kindess, he made me so at ease fitting into this family.

"See you around little sis."

Rosalie was next. We'd come to an unspoken mutually compatible living sitation. Supplemented by small talk and greatly helped along by the presence of other family members, she put up with me, and I gave her all of the respect and love I could reasonably return. She still wasn't pleased with my determination to become one of the undead, but we were family whatever way you looked at it.

"Enjoy it," She smiled gently, genuinely, "you only go to college for the first time once."

I smiled in response, unsure how to receive her acknowledge that college may happen more than once for me.

Jasper was a one-armed half hug. And Carlisle followed with a slightly more embracing and affectionate goodbye.

Esme and Alice were stood side-by-side. And they both hugged me, squeezing me as tight as they dared.

"You can call any time." Esme reassured, holding my face between her soft, cool hands. "Any time" she reiterated, "For anything."

"Thank you Esme." She had tried to make a point of this in the brief time Edward and I had been home. She was not Renee, and was certainly not trying to replace her. But she was also my mom now. And with the added complications of my change in the mix, she wanted me to begin to rely on her more, rather than trying to keep all these big emotional decisions to myself.

"And me!" Alice piped up. "Please, I'm going to miss you so much whilst you're gone. I'll come visit, but this will be your first home together and I'm not going to encroach on that. But I'm your best friend. And I'll miss our conversations."

Three or four mornings out of the week, once Edward had left bed to make me breakfast or go hunting with his brothers, Alice would coming skipping into the room and onto the bed. In the beginning I found this slightly grating, but she quickly realised that if she brought a mug of green tea with her, I was much more amiable to a gossip.

Oh no. How I was truly going to miss my sister. My down to earth, erratic, gentle-souled sister. The suddenly immense sadness gripped my throat tight and silent tears spilled down my cheeks.

"I'll definitely call." I sniffled out, then giggled "how else will I get to find out the thrilling conclusion of Lauren Mallory and Mr Banner's love affair?"

"Rumored love affair!" Alice interjected. "And I promise to keep you in the loop, the potential endings are scandalous!"

We all half-laughed, and a silence fell. Edward's arm wrapped around my waist reassuringly. The tears continued to run.

"Let's go, love."

I smiled one last brave smile at my family before turning to Edward.

"Let's go."

It took the length of the driveway and setting 3 on the Volvo's heating dial before the tears dried on my face.

"Goodbye is the hardest bit" Edward sympathised, his hand on my thigh as he drove.

"It is." I murmured in agreement. The familiar roads of home were nearly all behind us, and the pain of the nostalgia was wearing off. I was maybe beginning to feel giddy at the journey ahead of us.

"Where to first, captain?"

Edward turned to smile at me, catching on to my good mood. "Well, officially, our first stop isn't for another 7 hours. But factoring in human needs, it may be sooner?"

"I forgot to go before we left." I admitted bashfully, "my emotions got the better of me."

Edward laughed heartily. "Am I gonna need to ask you to go to the bathroom before every leg of the journey?"

"I'm not a child." I huffed playfully, "but yes, I am forgetful, it might be a good idea."

Edward winded quickly and carefully along the 101, effortlessly darting past slower cars that the lesser confident driver (i.e. me) would've have conceded to being stuck behind for the next 3 hours. It was easy to doze off.

This was the first stage of our road trip that Edward had insisted on, and that I had actually been happy to comply with.

Dartmouth term started in 18 days, and rather than fly across the country, Edward had the idea to make a road trip out of the drive. I can't say I was looking forward to a culturally enriching experience across the northern states of the country I'd lived in all my life, but we'd looked up some interesting stops along the way.

I think a part of his motivation was getting me out the house. I had taken to spending an average day mostly indoors, reading, cooking, or playing games with the family.

I wouldn't like to call it lazy, but yeah, I was being gloriously lazy these last few weeks, and I was getting very comfortable with it. Consequently, I have moved a notch up on my belt, and my skinny jeans were beginning to feel very skinny.

Each evening though, I could see this ticking behind Edward's eyes. This worry and concern that I wasn't living some of my final human days to the fullest.

I was though. At home, I lived my best life. My groggy, half-asleep mornings with Alice nattering her latest and hottest gossip and begging for a trip to Portland; My afternoons in the kitchen, with Esme (you know, my mother-in-law who doesn't eat) teaching me how to make a hollandaise sauce; My perusals through Carlisle's library, and my lazy afternoon in the bay window reading the latest classic he'd absolutely insisted on. I ate fantastic food, slept restfully through beautiful dreams, made love to my gorgeous husband, and had even begun singing in the shower, much to Emmett's dismay (I imagine the entire family didn't love it too much, but no one else had made comment).

I understood Edward's hankering for adventure though. And trying to make love to your husband in a house full of vampires when you, as a human, have no concept of how loud you are actually being, was mildly awkward. I was excited to be alone, and loudly passionate again.

 **10/12/19 Hey kids. I'm back. Started listening to a new album by Odesza and all my twilight love came flowing back. I wanted to start writing a new story but I couldn't just leave this one hanging. I love it too much. Hope you enjoy the new chapter. I have already started draft for next chapter so hopefully it won't be a year until the next one (:**


End file.
